The plane! The plane!

There are two kinds of airline passengers in this world. People who are flying with kids and everyone else who hates them.

Of course, I am not saying I don't understand the haters. Trust me. I've flown plenty and I've had more than one flight where I gritted my teeth, turned up my headset and counted the minutes until we landed. But still. I never thought kids shouldn't be allowed on planes.

I heard this sentiment today on facebook and everyone was up in arms one way or the other. And interestingly, I've heard this before from other friends...who don't have kids. As someone who has one, it's hard not to get all prickly about it.

Here's why.....I literally do everything in my power to ensure that A. has a good flight. I book our flights around her naptime. She's got ample milk, snacks, water, crayons, books, stuffed animals...we even try to fly Jet Blue so she's got television.
And I can say that about 90 percent of the time, she does just great. Lots of people to flirt with on planes so she's happy. 90 percent of the time, people tell me how good she was. I'm usually sweating and covered with sour milk and Cheddar Bunny crumbs at that point but I always say "thanks."

But then of course, there is that 10 percent. Oh, the ugly 10 percent.

Trust me, we're working hard to make sure she isn't screaming, kicking the chair in front of her, climbing all over the ground or smacking the tush of a flight attendant (which she did on a really small plane once....eek....).

However, I don't think it's worth keeping her off planes altogether because every once in a while, she utters a peep. She deserves to see her relatives who live in other parts of the country. And quite frankly, I've sat near much worse fliers who were a whole lot older. Like the itchy man who scratched (psoriasis?) all the way to Vancouver. Or the exceptionally smelly teenager who made things worse by opening up a bag of Corn Nuts (are you kidding me?) and then Doritos. Or the super loud talkers who should at least have had the decency to be interesting.

You see? I don't think those people shouldn't be allowed to fly. Even though they made my flights less than pleasant.

Until someone comes up with an airline designed just for kids, we're all just going to have to find a way to get along. In the meantime, if kids really bother you so much...maybe YOU SHOULDN'T FLY TO FLORIDA IN THE HOLIDAY SEASON. Or spring break. Or possibly, ever. Because grandparents live in Florida and so technically, all flights to and from Florida are the Grandparents Express. Which means you are actually on the kids' turf, not the other way around. Although they are usually kind enough not to complain about your presence.

That said, I apologize in advance to anyone flying with me to Florida this Saturday. A's naptime changed since I booked the flight. Best to take those headsets they'll be offering you.